Bad Days and Bad Timing

Have you ever noticed how family members always misbehave at the most inappropriate moments? Well, let me tell you, it's not just the little ones that spout off with remarks that make you want to don a cloak of invisibility.

My son was just having one of those days. You know those days - when everything goes wrong and you just wish you would've stayed in bed. We all have those days. Some of us have them more often than others.

He knew what kind of day it was going to be once he spilled his morning coffee. As the hot brew dribbled down his shirt, he bent to stop its travels by reaching for the dish towel on the counter. As luck would have it, his elbow nudged the pot knocking it to the floor, creating even more of a mess. Barely awake, he was already frustrated.

Unfortunately, bad days are more abundant than good in our household. It would be a miracle of great proportions if all of our family members could actually be in a good mood at the same time. That would go down in the history books for sure. Well, back to the bad day.

As time progressed, things didn't get any better. Little petty annoyances continued. He made a sandwich, tripped over the cat, lost the sandwich. The cat found it. I decided to start dinner a little early. I had a taste for spaghetti. Just after adding the sauce, my son decided to stir the spaghetti, which was a bad idea. Sauce splashed all over his shirt.

After tearing off the shirt, throwing it in the laundry and putting another one on, he decided to stir the spaghetti once again. If you're wondering why, I have no clue. But lo and behold, once again sauce splashed on the clean shirt. Needless to say, by this time, he was rather hot under the collar. I don't know why he just didn't stay away from the spaghetti.

The frustration level really peaked when he went to the bathroom and his cell phone fell into the toilet. Yes, it was definetly one of those days. After thoroughly towel drying, then another ten minutes with the hair dryer, there was still no dial tone. The phone remained damp and lifeless.

Back out to the kitchen he went to make another cup of coffee to drink rather than spill. My poor son sat there with his head in his hands staring at the phone. I felt like I should say something positive - something I knew he wouldn't want to hear anyway, so I did the sensible thing and said nothing instead. I tried to mind my own business in a nonchalant way so I busied myself with straightening the house.

After a few minutes, my son finished his cup of coffee, placed the cup in the sink and went to take a shower. The phone rang - the house phone, that is. Another minor irritation. I knocked on the bathroom door. The water abruptly went silent. "Huh?" came the reply. "I'm sorry to disturb you but that was your work on the phone. They need you to come in early," I said as gingerly as possible. "Great," was all I heard before the water turned back on.

Being rushed to work earlier than had been expected only served as more fuel for an already raging temperament. With one shoe on and one off, the stress continued to mount. The phone rang at the same time that someone began knocking on the door. As I headed toward the phone, I heard my usually polite son yell, "Who the f--- is it?!" Then I heard the words, "Is your mother home?" I rounded the corner only to come face to face with my landlord of all people.

Immediately my face went into polite apologetic mode. Mindlessly, the words poured forth. "I'm terribly sorry. It's just been one of those days." He looked at me with what I thought was the hint of a grin seeping from one corner of his mouth. "I just brought some stuff for the drain in the bathroom sink," he said. "Oh, thank you," I replied, embarrassed smile still firmly planted on my face. Glancing over his shoulder at my son, I gave him a look quite different from the polite face meant for my landlord. My son responded with a shrug of his shoulders.

I am quite capable of embarrassing myself. I don't know why my family members have to insist on doing it for me. But I guess that's what family is for. Even when I'm not the one having one of those days, I end up feeling like I would have been better off just staying in bed.

Darlene Zagata is a freelance writer and columnist for the print publication Moon Shadows Magazine. She is also the author of "Aftertaste: A Collection of Poems" and "The Choosing." Her work has been published extensively both online and in print. For more information visit her website at http://darlenezagata.tripod.com or contact Darlene at darzagata@yahoo.com

In The News:


A bit of Federer humor
San Francisco Chronicle,  USA - 10 hours ago
Roger Federer seems to be enjoying himself more at this tournament than any US Open or Wimbledon I can recall (which is about all I can speak for, ...

Book review: Inspiration and humor for DIY-ers
Chicago Sun-Times, United States - 19 hours ago
BY KAY SEVERINSEN - SearchChicago-Homes Editor Ever wondered what possesses the people who rehab vintage homes? Not only are the homes decrepit and filthy ...
Their house was so ugly they called it the 'barn' Chicago Sun-Times
all 2 news articles

Lionsfans.com

The Den: Finding Humor in Loss
Lionsfans.com - 3 hours ago
By RoarReport.com Staff OK, so perhaps Detroit's season opener didn't go exactly as expected. But that didn't stop members of The Den message board from ...

Scientific American

Microsoft’s Seinfeld Campaign: Random Humor, No Vista
Wall Street Journal Blogs, NY - Sep 5, 2008
The 90-second ad is basically a showcase for Seinfeld’s observational humor and Gates’s penchant for self parody. Gates is buying a pair of shoes at Shoe ...
What's With the New Microsoft Ads? Wired News
The curious case of the Microsoft-Seinfeld ad Internet News
Microsoft Seinfeld Ad Not Exactly a Hit WebProNews
Slashdot - Adweekall 558 news articles

Colantuono Tries To See The Humor Of It All
Goal.com, Switzerland - Sep 6, 2008
A few days after his shock dismissal as Palermo coach, Stefano Colantuono talked about his side of the story. The coach had already been sacked by the ...

Comedian uses humor to fight illness
Honolulu Advertiser, HI - 17 hours ago
But Irvine relies on humor to touch on the universal challenges of fighting temptation and depression among diabetics. "Having diabetes can get very ...

eFluxMedia

Microsoft Sprinkles Seinfeld-Gates Humor In Its “Warm-Up” Ad
eFluxMedia - Sep 6, 2008
However, if you just take the ad itself, it's actually funny, sprinkled with some Seinfeld humor and Bill Gates' complete lack of acting skills, ...

Strawman Logic Easily Shows Humor, Absurdity
TriCities.com, TN - Sep 6, 2008
By Letters To The Editor In the spirit of election season lightheartedness, I would like to submit a written impression of the run-of-the-mill, ...

Walking the thin line between humor and oppression
Manila Bulletin, Philippines - Sep 5, 2008
Himaruya’s ability to find humor in a historical event is a mark of his genius. As a teacher of mine once said, it takes great understanding and wisdom to ...

Boston Globe

HBO's vampire tale taps a vein of dark humor and gothic romance
Boston Globe, United States - Sep 5, 2008
Just the name Sookie Stackhouse captures a sense of the humor - it's a slight parody of a typical young-adult heroine's name, like Pippi Longstocking, ...
humor - Google News


Ebooks, Scripts, Websites, and more...

Adsense websites

How To Marry A Wealthy Guy

How To Marry A Wealthy Guy(or Girl... Or at least... Read More

The Hidden Driveway

I won't lie: there are a lot of things I... Read More

Very Precise Fortune Cookies

I cracked open the fortune cookie and read the little... Read More

Its All About Seeing the Signs

Ace of Base hasn't seen the sign for quite some... Read More

Dumb Luck

I've never really thought of myself as being funny. I... Read More

Do Americans Really Understand Irony?

Let me start by saying that 'I am an American'... Read More

Psychiatric Psychiatrist - A Joke on Psychiatry

A few weeks ago I went to see a psychiatrist.We... Read More

New Orleans First to Experience Housing Bubble Burst

Are we starting to see the Housing Bubble Burst in... Read More

Norm Goldman Interviews Comedienne Fran Capo,the Guinness Book Worlds Record for the Fastest Talking

Today, Norm Goldman, Editor of Sketchandtravel & Bookpleasures is delighted... Read More

The Patience of Job

Voltaire said, "God is a comedian playing to an... Read More

Maybelle Misfire Joins Mega Corp

To: Maybelle Misfire From: I. M.. Power, VP Welcome aboard!... Read More

Dog Poo - And You Thought You Had Problems

In Southern Germany in a town by the name of... Read More

Stopping Bad Breath Bart

"Pee-ew! You smell like a skunk soaking in sardine nectar... Read More

I Got to Play an April Fools Joke Before I was Born

I will start this by saying that yes, I did... Read More

Coffee Tips (and the Elimination Thereof)

I have recently become frustrated with something at doughnut establishments,... Read More

When It Rains, It Pours: Creating a Plan

It's time for me to announce that I have a... Read More

Humor Quotations - Top 35 Funny Quotations by Famous Comedians

"Education is worth a whole lot. Just think - with... Read More

Funny Things We Dream

I often wonder why I wake up so happy, ready... Read More

Cant Get There From Here

... Read More

The Jokes On You -- Who Should be the Butt of Your Jokes?

This article was prompted by something I heard (second hand)... Read More

Discover the Lighter Side of the Internet

We all know the Internet is a great tool for... Read More

Marines Dont Take Crap

We... Read More

The Zapp Principle

My dad's lab was a mess, but then it was... Read More

When Humans and Dogs Collide: Negotiations for Todays Changing Times

This morning I decided to find myself. I originally looked... Read More

Bed Bugs Bite

I just turned on the news a minute ago and... Read More