Is Your Marriage Problem Severe Enough To Warrant Getting A Divorce?

Having a marriage problem can be agonizing especially if you're trying to do all you can to make your marriage work. Depending on how your marriage was prior to thinking that you had a marriage problem, you could be in for a hurtful time if you don't take a step back and look at your marriage problem from a "helicopter" viewpoint. To do that, you're going to need to try to limit your emotional stake in the situation which admittedly is a difficult thing to do.

The first step in getting over a marriage problem is to remember that you aren't alone, lots of couples have marriage problems that stem from all kinds of different types of behavior.

Here's a partial list of marriage problems that you may or may not be experiencing:

Marriage problem #1:

Lack of sexual intimacy - a serious issue that you must work through in my opinion if your going to work it out.

Marriage problem #2:

Exploding during an argument, getting too emotional and letting your temper get the best of you - you need to learn to work together and you can't do that if one of you is getting too heated.

Marriage problem #3:

Being selfish - eventually this will catch up to you. You should always think of your partner when you think of yourself.

Marriage problem #4:

Being dishonest - another serious issue. If you cannot be 100% honest and open with your mate, you're marriage is most likely doomed or at the very least unhappy.

Marriage problem #5:

Teasing too much - generally the husband does this but it could go either way. If there's a little bit of truth to the teasing or there's a greater marriage problem that incites the teasing, you could be in for a long road to recovery together. Chances are that you'll have a lot more work to do to correct this marriage problem.

Marriage problem #6:

Not respecting your spouse - this marriage problem can result in all types of other problems. If you are experiencing this you must get to the root of this and figure out why the disrespect is present. If you aren't getting the every day respect that you deserve, make it a priority to not let this go on another day.

Marriage problem #7:

Not being attentive to your spouse or not listening to your spouse - men are usually guilty of this marriage problem but is isn't exclusive to the weaker gender by any means. Really listening doesn't mean obeying, it means understanding what's important to your spouse and acting accordingly.

Obviously there are many other things that could be labeled a "marriage problem", you have to decide what those are as they pertain to your situation.

So, how do you figure out if a marriage problem or problems are severe enough to warrant a divorce?

You should first examine what your marriage problem actually is and decide if it is exclusively a problem for you or if it is something that you both consider to be a marriage problem. If you are the only one who sees the said action as a marriage problem, you have to decide whether or not that specific marriage problem is being caused by you or whether it is truly a problem brought on by your spouse. If the marriage problem is unique to you, seek some help from a counselor and do yourself the courtesy of trying to correct the problem before you believe that you need to run right out and get a divorce. You'll be a better person for it because you will have fixed something within yourself.

However, if you truly believe that the marriage problem is caused and prolonged by your spouse, sit down with yourself first and examine what you believe to be the root cause of the behavior that creates the marriage problem. Make sure that you are being logical when you identify the behavior that you feel is causing the marriage problem and try to recall if the traits or behavior that you've identified in your spouse are 'fixable' in your mind...assuming of course, that your spouse will agree that you are right.

Next, approach your spouse with the information that you've reflected on and try to talk through the cause of the marriage problem. Hopefully your spouse will be open to constructive discussion regarding the marriage problem so you can work through it together. If you cannot do work on the marriage problem together, seek the help of a mediator or marriage counselor so you can actually talk out the marriage problem logically. If you cannot work it out after counseling, other divorce advice, deep self-reflection and discussions, you should be able to decide whether or not the marriage problem warrants a divorce or not.

Of course, no one can decide this but you.

Karl Augustine

"A Practical Guide To Deciding Whether Or Not To Get A Divorce"

An eBook recommended by marriage counselors and relationship coaches to their clients.

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Marriage Problem

In The News:


24dash

Divorce at 26-year low, unless you're over 60
guardian.co.uk, UK - 4 hours ago
Divorce rates in England and Wales are at their lowest for 26 years, official figures showed yesterday. Office for National Statistics research found the ...
Divorce rate falls to 26-year low Times Online
Divorce at lowest rate for 26 years The Press Association
Divorce rate lowest for 26 years BBC News
Divorce Diva - Telegraph.co.ukall 93 news articles

Divorce stalks Katrina survivors
CNN - 11 hours ago
But what's really agonizing for him is that his wife of 16 years says she is considering a divorce. Watch their difficult living situation » "My whole life ...

Divorce rates drop in Australia
The Age, Australia - 19 hours ago
Australia is experiencing a marriage "renaissance" with figures showing divorce rates have had their biggest yearly drop in two decades while marriage rates ...
For a happy marriage, get cashed up NEWS.com.au
Australia's divorce rate tumbles Daily Telegraph
all 22 news articles

After Divorce Trend, More German Couples Stay Married
Deutsche Welle, Germany - 14 hours ago
Divorce is down ever so slightly, reflecting a trend over the last few years. Couples also stay together longer before severing the knot. ...

Death, divorce and catalogue shopping
Financial Times, UK - 2 hours ago
By Isabel Berwick Being 40 or thereabouts is suddenly fashionable. It’s the life crisis of choice for the writers and programme makers who have grown up ...

Complaint says judge got special deal
Minneapolis Star Tribune, MN - 21 hours ago
Timothy Blakely might have sent business to his lawyer and later received a markdown of $63503 on his divorce. By ROCHELLE OLSON, Star Tribune Homicide map: ...
Dakota County / Judge denies divorce fee deal Pioneer Press
Minnesota judicial board alleges wrongdoing by Goodhue County judge Post-Bulletin
Minn. board alleges wrongdoing by judge West Central Tribune
all 25 news articles

Goodhue County judge got special deal in divorce, complaint says
Minneapolis Star Tribune, MN - Aug 28, 2008
A Goodhue County Judge improperly received a $63503 discount on his $108876-divorce in exchange for directing mediation business to the lawyer who handled ...

Etsu Nupe, others order Bello to divorce 82 wives
The Punch, Nigeria - 22 hours ago
... the country on Thursday ordered a preacher with 86 wives, Mallam Abubakar Bello, to divorce 82 of his wives or vacate the Bida Emirate within two days. ...
Divorce 82 wives or leave Nupe land - Monarch tells man with 86 wives Nigerian Tribune
Nigeria: Etsu Nupe Threatens to Banish Man With 86 Wives AllAfrica.com
all 3 news articles

Andhara files for divorce
Jakarta Post, Indonesia - Aug 28, 2008
JAKARTA: Model-cum-actress Andhara Early, playmate for the first edition of Indonesian Playboy magazine, has filed for divorce against Cesa David Lukmansyah ...

Daily Mail

Billionaire Tory party treasurer faces Britain's biggest divorce ...
This is London, UK - 4 hours ago
Billionaire Tory Party treasurer Michael Spencer, one of Britain's wealthiest men, faces the prospect of a record divorce payout after the breakup of his ...
Tory treasurer and wife split after 25 years Times Online
Icap boss Michael Spencer and wife separate Telegraph.co.uk
City tycoon Michael Spencer's £1bn break-up This is London
all 8 news articles
divorce - Google News


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